9 million FHM readers managed to stop masturbating long enough to cast their vote in the 14th edition of the magazine’s ’sexiest’ poll, for Megan Fox. As such Megan Fox is now the no 1 out of FHM’s 100 most raw female meat-puppets worldwide. And yes, I do mean that she was voted the sexiest woman in the world. And by a meat puppet I actually mean the flesh around a vagina that has been shaped to perfection through surgical interventions to fit a commercial stereotype… naaah, I’m gonna give up while I’m ahead…

According to the complete FHM top ten, Megan Fox managed to best Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Elisha Cuthbert, Scarlett Johansson, Emmanuelle Chriqui, Hilary Duff, Tricia Helfer, Blake Lively and Kate Beckinsale.

But what the magazine failed to tell its readers is that Megan Fox also out-performed the waves of pure sexiness emanating from the Vicar of Buddha, none other than Pope Benedict XVI formerly known as Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, a herd of unmilked cows, and redneck extravaganza on parade Britney Spears…